Monday, November 2, 2009
Uhhggg....time change means I am up at 0630! Oh my goodness it is early for me these days!! So bloggin here I come!
My last few days up in Atlanta last week with Ben were good. He started to perk up a little bit more and get a grasp on his med changes. He still continues to have seizure activity. Dr. Kailin explained to me that he was not having generalized seizures (shaking, eyes rolling back, losing control) but Ben's are focal. Focal seizures mess with you on a cognitive level so everything that Ben has been trying so hard to do is being inturupted by the seizures. Ben's doc boosted his seizure med and said that if he did not respond to it by Monday (today) that he was going to add another med. I am hoping not because it may cause Ben to become more drowsy again. Seizures in traumatic brain injury patients are not uncommon sometimes can trigger the brain for the good! I am praying that it triggers Ben's brain for the good and also that he won't need anymore added medications! By Friday Ben was started to get back to what he was doing. He was following commands very well, mouthing a few words that we gave him and moving his legs and arms more than normal.
On Thursday I had the priviledge and honor to meet with an amazing woman! The military flew her up from Tampa for the day to meet me and be an encouragement. Her husband was in a helicopter accident 2.5 years ago overseas. She has stood by his side and been through all the emotions that one could go through in a time like this. She came into Ben's room and looked at him and was very positive to him! Ben you look awesome, you look strong, Rangers are fighters and you keep fighting! She talked to him as if she had known him for years! She was able to encourage me, hear my heart, answer my questions, share my tears and most of all share what Jesus was doing in her life. She is an amazing and strong woman and I highly look up to her!
I started my first Occupational therapy on Friday...can I say ouch! I can straighten my elbow fully but pronating (twisting to a normal position) is still stiff and somewhat painful. My therapist took some measurments on how much I could move it and then put some heat to it. I knew that when she put the heat to it that pain was coming! Oh yes, she twisted and streched my arm in ways that it has not gone in a bit! It was good for my arm but it was a bit tender all weekend! I am so looking forward to my appointment with her on Wed...haha!
This weekend for me was a decent one...not my best but I made it. I love being with Ben and it tears me up inside when I have to leave him. I don't have to leave him but it is good for me to take a few days to get things done and be at our home. There are a few times when tears just came to my eyes. I was getting ready for church on Sunday and just started bawling when a worship song came on. It was Hillsongs Lead Me to the Cross....heard it a bunch of the times but today it got to me. The chorus...
Lead me to the cross
Where Your love poured out
Bring me to my knees
Lord I lay me down
Rid me of myself
I belong to You
Lead me, lead me to the cross...I had to stop putting on my make-up and kneel at the end of my bed (have not done in awhile) and just pray and sing this song out loud. I had to pour my heart and emotions out before the Lord...I had cooped them up for a bit too long!Jesus is faithful to me! Gives me what I need and opens my heart to learn things from Him.
Today (Monday) I am on my way to Atl to see my BEN!! I am so excited to see him, love on him and give him many kisses! He deserves them! I will of course get some cuddle time in bed with him as well! His closeness makes me feel so much better!!
This Thursday will be bittersweet! I am flying home to WA! I am going to take a few days and see some family and friends. It will be good for me but so hard at the same time. This means I have to leave Ben for a few days. Please pray for me during this time!
1. No more added seizure meds today for Ben!
2. Ben would QUICKLY follow commands and ANSWER yes/no questions
3. Physically his body would be strengthened....sit up, move his arms and legs more
4. He would hold his head correctly and his muscles in that area would loosen!
5. Peace for both of us while I am gone!
6. 100% healing in Ben's body!!
IN JESUS NAME!!!!
at 4:25 AM