Tuesday, July 31, 2012

from His dwelling place...

"I will remain quite, and I will look on from my dwelling place" Is. 18:4

"Assyria was marching against Ethiopia, the people of which are described as tall and smooth. And as the armies advance, God makes no effort to arrest them; it seems as though they will be allowed to work their will. He is still watching them from His dwelling place, the sun still shines on them; but before the harvest, the whole of the proud army of Assyria is smitten as easily as when sprigs are cut off by the pruning hook of the husbandman.

Is not this a marvelous conception of God--being still and watching? His silence is not to be confused with passive agreement or consent.  He is only biding His time, and will arise, in the most opportune moment, and when the designs of the wicked seem on the point of success, to overwhelm them with disaster. As we look out on the evil of the world; as we think of the apparent success of wrong-doing; as we wince beneath the oppression of those that hate us, let us remember these marvelous words about God being still and beholding.

There is another side to this. Jesus beheld His disciples toiling at the oars through the stormy night; and watched though unseen, the successive steps of the anguish of Bethany, when Lazarus slowly passed through the stages of mortal sickness, until he succumbed and was borne to the rocky tomb. Jesus was simply waiting for the perfect moment when He could intercede most effectively! 
Is the Lord being quite with your? Nevertheless, He is attentive and still sees everything. He has His finger on your pulse and is extermely sensitive to even the lightest change. And He will come to save you when the perfect moment has arrived.   

Whatever the Lord may ask of us or however slow He may seem to work, we can be absolutely sure He is never a confused and fearful Savior!"

"O troubled soul, beneath the rod,
Thy Father speaks, be still, be still;
Learn to be silent unto God,
And let Him mould thee to His will.

"O praying soul, be still, be still,
He cannot break His plighted Word;
Sink down into His blessed will,
And wait in patience on the Lord.

"O waiting soul, be still, be strong,
And though He tarry, trust and wait;
Doubt not, He will not wait too long,
Fear not, He will not come too late."
[streams in the desert - july 17.]

Ever feel like God has passed you up? Feel like He pays more attention to others situations and not yours? Healings and desires seem to come very easily to others?
I feel that way and have felt this way at times. I pray, spend time in the Word, worship, go to church, care for my man and do what I think are all the right things that God has asked me to do. Oh did I mention pray? I don't pray so much for healing because I don't want Ben's healing to be my idol, I want Ben's healing to be about God and who He is and what He has done.

I love the sentance above that states, "He has His finger on your pulse and is extermely sensitive to even the lightest change." Wowzers! Jesus has time to watch even my pulse! He knows when is changes for the better or for the worse...yours too! I remember taking pulses when I was working and how intricate a job it was to count the beats and be aware if anything unual was going on. But Jesus keeps His finger on our pulse and also knows whats going on in the intermost beings of our heart and soul!

This takes me to the very last line before the poem..."however slow He may seem to work." This one hits way to close to home! We are coming up on three years! Three years of our lives being forever changed and so not what we ever dreampt of, at all! Some days I just don't know how much slowness I can take. I literally can only put one foot in front of the other and that is as far as I get that day...one foot ahead! I see Ben doing things and struggling to do them. Like walking. He walks with his walker but his balance is so off, his hips are crooked and twisted, his head and shoulders are not aligned and his left foot is rolling in when he doesn't wear his brace...but he is walking. We both want him to desperatley walk on his own with none of these issues. He is getting so close but he seems to be stuck in a rut because of these things that hold him back. I know God sees this. I know God can fix it and yet we sit here and wait...oh how slowly this whole thing is. This is just one of the areas in which I feel God is slow in. Obvioulsy the biggest one is overall healing.

Yet, the rest of that sentance ends like this..."we can be absolutely sure He is never a confused and fearful Savior!" He doen't comfuse us with another sick person that needs just as much healing. God is not fearful in what He is able to do! God doens't need us telling him what to do. He is not confused and He is not fearful! He is amazing!!

Quiteness from the Lord doesn't mean that He is ignoring us. Quiteness from the Lord doesn't mean that He is not up to anything. Quiteness from the Lord means he is in his dwelling in His place and He is watching...you and me! Just in the right moment He will do what He does best...come to us...in the way that we need it most, in the moment we need it most.

I am sure I will have more days of wondering why, when, where, how and all of this healing in Ben adn I will take place but in those times I will just have to remind and trust Him that He "will arise in the most oportune moment" for Ben and I!

Sunday, July 22, 2012


[we had a date to a wedding last night.love him.]
late last friday night we got home from a road trip to redding, ca. we, nor ben's brother and sister, were able to attend ben's grandparents memorials in april so we all decided on a date to gather together and hang. ben's aunt graciously offered up her home to all of us! we decided that since i was the only one driving that we would spend the night on the way down. it is about an 8-9 hour drive and it was quite hot so a stop was needed. ben and i went to our friends lil girls b-day party on a saturday and we took off about 4 that afternoon. we were going to stop in a little town sutherland, or but decided just to eat dinner there, gas up and move on. medford, or is where we stopped. i actually could have kept driving but ben needed to stretch and be done for the night. well, we didn't know if we were going to be staying the night anywhere on the road so we didn't book a hotel. little did we know they had baseball tournements there and so by the 3rd hotel we finally got their last room!

we took our time on sunday getting up and getting ready, of course finding a starbucks was a must! we only had about 2.5 hours to go so it was not a long jaunt at all. it was a clear hot day so mt. shasta was out very clearly and lake shasta was super aqua in color! loved the view!

all in all we had a great time with ben's family. the boys did some things, the girls did some things and then we all did some things together. it was HOT! thank goodness ben's aunt had a pool because we spent alot of time in it and around it! i couldn't get enough drinking water down us but somehow we didn't get dehydrated and were just fine!

photo dump alert...

[on our way...8-9 hours and counting] 

[you know just a lil heat] 

[holler!! had this a few times!] 

[pool time!] 

[ben and his brother joe getting their aunt] 

[sundial bridge] 

[hey ben, a parrot on your head!] 

[i got one on mine too] 

[his tail feathers were a tad to close to our faces]

[they were so hot they needed ice chips] 

[at turtle bay]


[i sat here alot] 

[brothers working out] 

[with his brother and sister} 


[wrestling with his dad and brother] 

[working on walking and balancing] 

[taking a shade break] 

[went for a run and this hill at the end was the death of me] 

[ben was so tired one night i found him resting at the dinner table until we said ice cream!]

[ben loved his noodles] 

[brothers wrestling]

this past tuesday ben and his ot decided to go on a hike! they went to one close to the house and went for 2 miles with no walker or wheelchair. ben's ot pretty much walks behind ben to support him. they had to go up hill, down hill, climb stairs and sit back to back on a bench to get some rest! while they were gone i got an insanity workout in, they are no joke y'all!
ben said he loved it and they are going to another location this tues! i think i might just join them!

 [he was a bit tired after his hike and shower!]

[sweat, sweat and sweat! love insanity just for that!]

one more lil fun thing we did is meet our friends sweet new lil baby A! she is amazing and adorable! ben loved getting some cuddles in with her too!

thanks for being patient on the blog posts! summers are busy and i don't want to stop posting but i know they are a bit more few and far between! don't worry you lil hearts out if you don't hear from us! if anything were to go wrong you would know!!

next blog post is about ben and his boat!

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

computer flubs...

{via google}

well in trying to get a
post up tonight but my
computer decides to
over heat. is this a new
thing you ask? nope.
its old and really needs
a burial but it still works.
kind of, sort of.

i am doing this next
update piece by piece
so that it wont lose
everything that i put
on here or shut down
on me.i would attempt from
my iphone but that would
take way.to.long.
dealing with it i am.
please stand by!